Baba
Perilous marriage
Namaskar,
There are numerous marriages where margiis have married non-margiis. And still this is going on. As Sadguru Baba has clearly addressed this matter we should be aware of the stand of Ananda Marga teachings on this issue. And everyone should be aware about the pitfalls and ramifications.
Marriage is like two wheels of a vehicle
Married couples are like two wheels of a vehicle, and the whole vehicle is their unit family. So a married couple has to carry and share the responsibility in a proper way. If one wheel is yanked off the automobile and a replacement wheel is taken from a bullock cart, you can imagine the situation. Will the vehicle be mobile? Never, or only after pushing it; and if it does move a little, it will never be smooth. Rather, the journey will be bumpy and tortuous.
For successful margii family life, the married couple should be complementary to one another. That means both should be on the path of Ananda Marga, otherwise it will not work. If any sincere margii brother marries a non-margii sister, or vice-versa, their life together will never be facile or fully functional. It will be akin to placing a wheel from a bullock cart on an automobile. It will not run properly, and it might not move at all.
How could a non-margii take marriage oath
In marriage, Baba has given the mantra and meaning, which is treated as an oath. The mantra begins with the following vow; first the groom repeats it and then the bride.
Ananda Marga Caryacarya marriage vow says, "I say on oath in the name of Parama Brahma and Marga Gurudeva that out of my own free will I will accept Shriimatii / Ms. ... as my wife." (1)
In this above quote, the oath is taken "In the name of Parama Brahma and Marga Gurudeva." Here the point is that if the oath taker does not believe in Marga Gurudeva, then taking an oath in His name has no meaning for that person. To take an oath in someone's name, one must have adoration for that person or entity.
For example, if one margii takes oath in the name of Marga Gurudeva, then that has deep meaning. Because the margii has heartfelt feeling for Baba, our Marga Guru. But if that same margii takes an oath in the name of Allah, Jesus, or Hanuman, then what will be the sense of that when the margii has no feeling for them.
Similarly, if a non-margii brother or sister takes the oath on the name of Marga Gurudeva, then what meaning will that have when they themselves do not feel that Baba is their Guru. If they had the feeling that Lord Shrii Shrii Anandamurtiji is their Guru then they would have taken initiation. Without that, it is just hypocritical to take an oath in Marga Guru's name. Officially on paper the oath can be done, but in the real sense no oath has been taken.
Without faith on Sadguru oath is fake
In the tantra of Ananda Marga, an oath is taken very seriously. One must have a deep feeling, connection, and commitment to take an oath. Moreover, here we are talking about marriage, a lifelong vow and duty. So the marriage oath is an important matter. It must not be taken on the name of one entity for which one has no feeling. Otherwise that is just hypocrisy.
This marriage oath is Baba's clear-cut injunction on marriage. Because this oath is being taken on the name of Marga Gurudeva. And as is already stated, when one has no heartfelt feeling or adoration for Marga Gurudeva, then that oath has no meaning. So this oath is very direct, and it is given directly by Baba. A non-margii cannot take or live up to this oath.
On this basis, it is proven that both parties intending to marry within the Ananda Marga marriage system must be initiated margiis who accept Baba as their Guru.
The Ananda Marga marriage oath continues, "I take upon myself all the responsibility for her food, clothes, education, medical care, etc, from today". (2)
The groom has to take this vow first, and then the bride does the same.
Non-margii spouses have other allegiance
If a non-margii takes this vow of responsibility for the neohumanistic, dogma-free education of their spouse, then how are they going to fulfill that vow? Already their own mind is coloured with all the dogma of some religious or materialistic outlook, then whatever education they provide to their spouse will be colored by that dogma. The non-margii cannot fulfill the marriage oath of providing a dogma-free education to their spouse. So as a non-margii, this part of the oath too has no meaning.
On this point of education, the worst thing will be if a program is being held at a mosque, or church, or pseudo-culture party and side by side there is an event at the jagrti on the same day. The non-margii spouse will like to go to their chosen event, and the margii will want to go to the jagrti. Each will like to bring the other to their preferred site, and in result the house will become a battlefield. This will be multiplied if their child is involved in this tug-of war.
Not only that, one day there will be a religious festival or materialistic carnival, and the non-margii will like to bring their margii spouse to join them at this non-veg feast. Yet that will be against the marriage vow. Baba has given the point of neo-humanistic education in the marriage vow, and non-veg food goes against neo-humanism. Plus, the point of food is also included in this same marriage vow.
Quarrel on food choices
The married couple vows to take responsibility for each other's food and nutritional needs. ("I take upon myself all the responsibility for his / her food..." (3)
And in Ananda Marga way of life, one essential aspect is taking sentient food. So convincing your spouse to attend a non-veg event is contrary to our Ananda Marga marriage vows. On this point, the non-margii wife will be unable to fulfill her vow.
And the margii brother will be similarly unable to fulfill his vow to educate and take care of food of his non-margii wife. Because she will not accept his efforts to bring her to the path of neohumanism, preferring instead to pursue her dogmatic practices. Plus, as his non-margii wife is a meat-eater taking onion and garlic, the margii brother will be unable to bring her to the path of vegetarianism and sentient food. And the same is true if the wife is a margii and the husband is a non-margii.
So altogether this entire oath will be a disaster. Again this first oath states, "I take upon myself all the responsibility for his / her food, clothes, education, medical care, etc, from today". (4)
But when margii and non-margii marry, the key aspects of food and education cannot be attended to properly between the two parties. Rather, crucial differences between the margii brother and the non-margii sister - and vice versa - are likely to lead to ongoing scuffles and clashes on these central points of food and education. Due to which, the household will be disrupted and will not function well. Indeed there will be terrible emotional angst and pain, and the arguing and intensity will multiply when they have children.
Mismatched marriage ruins mental peace
The next section of the marriage oath concerns mental progress.
According to Caryacarya, the groom must vow that, "I will be vigilant in every way to safeguard her mental peace and ensure her mental progress from today." (5)
For mental progress in Ananda Marga, the main point is to study Baba's books and learn Ananda Marga philosophy. But here, a non-margii spouse is not going to take interest. Having refused to take initiation, he or she will not have any regard for Guru's teachings. So that margii is destined to be frustrated in their efforts to see to their spouse's mental progress.
Similarly, the non-margii must take a vow to attend to the margii spouse’s mental progress. They must take the oath on Baba's name that, "I will be vigilant in every way to safeguard his mental peace and ensure his mental progress from today." (6) But when that non-margii is not familiar with Ananda Marga ideals, then how are they going to ensure their spouse’s progress.
A non-margii wife will not encourage her margii husband to read Ananda Marga books etc. Rather it is likely that she will sidetrack him away from Ananda Marga ideals. And same is the case if the husband is a non-margii and the wife is a margii. So in this sphere of mental progress, neither the margii will be able to fulfill their vows
toward their non-margii spouse, nor will the non-margii spouse be able to fulfill their vows toward their margii husband.
Fake vow
And the last part of the Ananda Marga marriage vows concerns spiritual progress. The margii must state, "I say on oath in the name of Parama Brahma and Marga Gurudeva that...I will be vigilant in every way to ensure [their] spiritual progress from today." (7)
Here it is obvious that the main factor in spiritual progress is to do kiirtan and sadhana with full love and bhakti for Guru Lord Shrii Shrii Anandamurti ji. Yet a non-margii spouse is not going to do kiirtan or sadhana when already they have refused to take initiation. So in that condition how will the margii be able to be vigilant to ensure any spiritual progress for their spouse, which they have taken a vow to do?
And the non-margii must take an oath on Baba's name that they will "be vigilant in every way to ensure their spouse’s spiritual progress from today." (8)
It is quite obvious that a non-margii having no interest in sadhana will be unable to have concern for the spiritual practices like kiirtan and sadhana of their margii mate. Rather generally, the opposite occurs. The non-margii spouse opposes the time spent in spiritual practice.
So we have seen that in the spiritual sphere, as well as in the physical and psychic spheres, the margii will be unable to ensure for the well-being of the their non-margii spouse, and the non-margii spouse will likewise be unable to watch for the well-being of the margii. In this setting, when that non-margii has no faith in Baba or in the 16 points, then for such a couple to take the marriage vows, which Baba has given in Caryacarya, are basically meaningless.
Conclusion
For the above-stated reasons, we can understand by the very meaning of the Ananda Marga marriage oaths, that Baba has given direct injunction that only margiis - only a margii groom and a margii bride - should be permitted to take these vows. Those not established on the path of tantra and Ananda Marga will never be able to live up to the ideal of those marriage vows. As His disciples we should be keen to help and guide people in this way.
Here Baba shows us what will be the fate of those who enter into unmatched marriages, i.e. marrying non-margiis.
Ananda Marga philosophy states, "Feeling of dislike takes place through the word jhanjhan. The wife of a certain gentleman that I knew was quite ill-mannered. One winter evening I saw this gentleman sitting quietly at the foot of a tree. I asked him: “Why are you sitting under this tree on a winter evening? You'll freeze.” He replied: “You know, my young friend, if I go in the house I'll hear only khankhan jhanhan. It's a lot more peaceful out here.”" (9)
Namaskar,
In Him,
Vidya’
References
1. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.31
2. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.31
3. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.31
4. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.31
5. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.32
6. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.32
7. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.33
8. Caryacarya - 1, '95 ed., p.33
9. Varna Vijiana, Derivation, Emanation and Distortion (Discourse 19)
* * *
The below sections are entirely different topics, unrelated to the above material.
They stands on their own as points of interest.
* * *
== Section 2: Important Teaching ==
Thievery: Ananda Margiis vs materialists
Ananda Marga ideology states, "Those who have attained the kámamaya kośa will say that it is not proper to steal since, if we steal, others may also steal from us. This is the trend of thought of the materialists. Their thinking is distorted with selfishness. One should not steal for the sake of keeping the mind pure. That is the correct approach." (1)
Note: Materialists as well as followers of certain religions think that, “If I steal from others then they might steal from me. For this reason, I should not steal from them.” Or they may think, “I should not steal otherwise I may get arrested.” This is their reasoning.
Upon careful analysis it is evident that selfishness is the operative factor. That is the motivation why those followers do not steal. So this type of approach is not asteya. Upon superficial view it may look like asteya, but it is not asteya. Because it is goaded by selfishness and still the tendency exists to steal.
In our Ananda Marga, our approach is radically different. A sadhaka thinks that, “I do not need anything other than Parama Purusa. The goal of human life is to realise Him. So I should always goad my mental energy towards Parama Purusa - not towards mundane things, let alone someone else’s worldly possessions. That is why I do not even have the desire to steal anything.” This approach is wholly devoid of selfishness. This comes within the realm of asteya, and that is what ideal Ananda Margiis follow.
Here are more reasons:
- We do not steal because by committing theft the mind is adversely affected. And first and foremost we want to keep the mind pure.
- One step above that is, “Because Parama Purusa does not want me to steal, that is why I do not steal.”
Tattva Deva
Reference
1. Subhasita Samgraha - 1, Invocation of the Supreme
== Section: Prabhat Samgiita ==
हे मेरे प्रभु ! तुम दिन रात चौबीसों घण्टे हमेशा साथ रहते हो
प्रभात सङ्गीत 4235 तोमारेई मानी काछे आछो जानी
भावार्थ
हे परमपुरुष ! मैं पूरी तरह तुम्हारे सामने अपना समर्पण करता हॅूं। मैं केवल तुम्हें ही चाहता हूँ और केवल तुम्हारी ही पूजा करताहॅूं। मैं अनुभव करता हॅूं कि तुम मेरे पास में ही रहते हो। सदा मेरे साथ ही रहते हो। तुम मेरे देवता हो और सबसे अधिक पूज्य हो, मेरे सब कुछ हो। मैं जाने अनजाने तुम्हें ही प्रेम करता हॅूं। दिन रात चौबीसों घण्टे मैं हमेशा तुम्हारी शरण में ही रहता हॅूं। हे मेरे भाग्य विधाता ! हे मेरे रक्षक प्रभु ! मैं पूरी तरह तुम्हारे सामने अपना समर्पण करता हॅूं। मैं अनुभव करता हॅूं कि सदा तुम मेरे पास में ही रहते हो। तुम मेरे सबसे अधिक पूज्य हो, मेरे सब कुछ हो।
हे मेरे प्रभु ! हे परमपुरुष ! तुम तो सब में हो इस विश्व के निर्माता ब्रह्मा से लेकर छोटी सी घास की पत्ती तक सबमें रहते हो। मैं भी तुम्हारा ही छोटा सा हिस्सा हॅूं। तुम्हारी भव्य सृष्टि का एक कण हूँ। तुम मेरे चारों ओर दिन रात रहते हो, फिर भी मैं तुम्हें अपने सुख दुख की कहानियाॅं सुनाने के लिए तलाशता रहता हॅूं। मैं पूरी तरह तुम्हारे सामने अपना समर्पण करता हॅूं।
हे बाबा ! तुम फूलों में रङ्ग भरते हो और अपनी अलौकिक मधुरता से उन्हें महकाते हो। मैं तो उस फूल का एक छोटा सा कण हॅूं। हे बाबा ! हे दिव्य संसार की सत्ता ! मेरा मन ‘सम्वित ‘ से भरने की कृपा करो। हे मेरे रक्षक प्रभु ! मैं पूरी तरह तुम्हारे सामने अपना समर्पण करता हॅूं। मैं अनुभव करता हॅूं कि तुम मेरे पास में ही रहते हो, सदा साथ ही रहते हो, तुम मेरे देवता हो और सबसे अधिक पूज्य हो मेरे सब कुछ हो।
References
1. Hindi purport translated by Dr. T.R. Sukul from original English purport by Ananda Marga Universal.
2. Sadguru Baba says (in GD, Delhi, 26 Feb 1984) that when writing a Prabhat Samgiita purport then very simple words should be used so that the common mass may understand. The above Hindu purport has been written according to that guideline.
== Section ==
Example how ritualistic devotion is sham / penance
Ananda Marga ideology says, “People’s life becomes mechanical, if they are overwhelmed with the sentiment that they must do such acts, must perform such yajiṋa, must rise in this manner and sit in this manner and get up in this manner and so on. Such a person is not happy and this type of ritualism cannot be called real Karma. To serve others at one’s sacrifice is called penance. In the absence of love any service or penance is for show and is therefore fruitless. All ritualistic devotion, sham penance, counting beads etc. are meant only for public show and true love and the Supreme goal are lost from sight. Brahma cannot be attained through actions, since the sweetness of joy is lacking in such ritualism. On the other hand the divine bliss is easily attainable to those who base their Sádhaná on love.” (1)
Reference
1. Subhasita Samgraha - 1, Yajiṋa and Karmaphala
== Section 3: Links ==
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