Children's Home Report #3: Wrong Outlook - Just Viewed as Financial Pawns

Mon, 15 Jul 2013 15:08:37

Baba

CHILDREN'S HOME REPORT-3:

WRONG OUTLOOK - JUST VIEWED AS FINANCIAL PAWNS

(Note: This is part of an extended series of letters. Links to earlier postings in this series are appended below. - Eds)

Namaskar,
Remember, Baba’s stated approach is that home girls should be given maximum training and encouraged to become wholetime workers of AMPS. That is the standard way to proceed. In those cases where the home girl really does not want to become a WT, then she may proceed to lead sentient, Ananda Marga family life. There is no other option. That is Guru’s mandate.

The only way to adhere to and fulfill Guru's above order is if Didis running those homes exemplify Ananda Marga ideals and treat the home girls with love and affection. Those girls must not be used as means to an end - as explained below.

Unfortunately, one of the chief problems with our children's homes is that some Didis see the children as their ticket to financial solvency and economic salvation. Because in the name of caring for and raising young kids, those didis garner huge donations, both from margiis and non-margiis. It is hearing about and seeing those kids that creates a sentimental urge in the hearts of those donors to give – and to give big. This is the way that certain Home Didis lure in financial donations.

Here I say “certain” Didis because not all are guilty in this way. Some definitely run top-notch children’s homes. We have all seen that. However, there is a very real and critical issue with some of our children's homes run by various Didis - as well as homes managed by some of our Dadas.

DIDI USES THE MONEY FOR HER OWN EXTRAVAGANCE:

A TRAGIC TALE OF HAVES & HAVE-NOTS

As noted, they use the children as tools for luring big donations. Yet when that money comes in, that money gets used by some didis for their own extravagance. They themselves keep up to 10, 12, or more pairs of shoes, many new clothes, costly cosmetics to beautify themselves, and other luxuries.

This type of thing – especially having so many pairs of shoes – is unheard of in Wt life and living as a renunciant. Yet some Didis running children’s homes are collecting and hoarding piles of new shoes, yet all the while the home girls are forced to walk the streets with old, worn-out shoes. And then they scold those home girls of having a hole in their shoes after 1 year of wear. Those callously blame and abuse the girls as being irresponsible. Didi justifies that, “Do you see a hole in my shoes?” But that thing is, Didi has multiple pairs of shoes – 10 or more – so naturally those are going to last much longer as Didi does not wear the same pair every day. Yet Didi harshly rebukes those innocent girls for wearing out their shoes. But again those poor home girls have 1 pair while Didi has 10 or more of better quality. This is definitely a case of haves vs have-nots. Unfortunately that is only the beginning of the tale.

Such children’s home Didis also eat rich dainties and delicacies which those children never get to taste. So it is a tragedy and crime on multiple levels. It is bad enough that these Didis are going against the code of aparigraha by hoarding fancy material goods etc, but they do so in the face of those children who are left as have-nots.

Those poor, innocent home girls do not get multiple shoes, extra shirts, and tasty treats. Rather those girls have one pair of shoes that are often worn out, plus one shirt that may have holes in it from being worn every day, and they eat peasant fare – only the most basic food available.

TWO POINTS OF AWARENESS

Here are two points to bear in mind regarding this critical issue.

1. This problem of mistreatment and abuse of kids in our children's homes is not limited only to those homes run by Didis. Similar issues exist in homes manage by Dadas.

2. Our entire system of children's homes is gender-separated. That means those children's homes run by Didis will only house girls; and those homes managed by Dadas will only have boys. That is Baba's system. Yet, Didis are prone to contravening this order as they sometimes have a few boys in their children's homes. No matter how pristine they portray their relation with those boys, they are crossing a boundary line. Such Didis get attached with those boys whereby even when those boys become teenagers, young adults and young men, those Didis have those males stay over with them - in their inner chambers. This type of extreme attachment is not befitting an avadhutika. And they are definitely contravening Baba's order. The end result is not good for those Didis, nor those males. In contrast, it is basically unheard of for a Dada to have young girls in a children's home. So this problem with Didis must be addressed and resolved.

WHOLETIMER / AVADHUTIKA CONDUCT RULES

Here are some of the Wt rules of conduct that Didis are supposed to follow.

- "One should attract others by one's sacrificing nature." (37 Wholetime Workers Rules, pt #20)

- "One should not be greedy." (37 Wholetime Workers Rules, pt #12)

- "You will always be accustomed to lead a hard and industrious life." (Wholetimer Conduct Rule, Fourteen Points, pt #6)

- “One should leave all sorts of luxuries.” (37 Wholetime Workers Rules, pt #6)

- “One should make others good by becoming an ideal person.” (37 Wholetime Workers Rules, pt #22)

These are WT rules for Didis, plus there are so many more codes of conduct our WT Didis must adhere to in their individual life as well as being caretakers of home girls.

Namaskar,
in Him,
Sushiila

Note 1: LINKS TO EARLIER LETTERS IN THIS SERIES

#1: http://anandamarganewsbulletin.blogspot.com/2013/05/call-to-rescue-home-girl-1.html

#2: http://anandamarganewsbulletin.blogspot.com/2013/07/childrens-home-report-1-about-giving.html

#3: http://anandamarganewsbulletin.blogspot.com/2013/07/childrens-home-report-2-history-of-home_12.html